By Gonny 
There’s a question buried in the Manual for Teachers (ACIM) that many of us would never dare to ask out loud:
Why would anyone choose to be sick?
To most people, illness is an unfortunate misfortune, a thing that happens to us. We speak of “coming down” with the flu, or “battling” a disease, as if our bodies are the battlefield and our role is passive and heroic at once. But A Course in Miracles pulls back the curtain and gently suggests:
Sickness is a decision.
Not a punishment, not a sin, not even something to be ashamed of, but a choice, made by a mind that forgot who it really is.
The Value of Pain?
“Healing is accomplished the instant the sufferer no longer sees any value in pain.” (M-5.I.1:1)
That line is radical. It doesn’t ask us to fight our symptoms harder or pray longer, it simply invites us to look at whether we still believe pain is useful.
Let’s pause here. That can feel very confronting.
“Me? Want pain? Of course not!”
But let’s look closer. Sometimes, pain brings us things we secretly crave: rest, care, attention, an excuse to stop doing what we don’t like. Maybe we don’t know how to say no…until our body says it for us. Maybe we don’t feel seen…until we’re in a hospital bed. Maybe we think being strong means carrying everything…until we collapse.
The ego whispers: “See? This pain is useful. It protects you. It gives you something you couldn’t get otherwise.”
And if we believe that, then yes…pain becomes a small price to pay for a greater treasure.
The Course goes further. It says:
Sickness is the choice of weakness, in the mistaken conviction that it is strength. It’s a wild reversal.
Think of someone who, deep down, believes that being vulnerable means being real. They might reject healing because, to them, healing feels like losing their truth. Or imagine a child who gets attention only when ill. To be well would mean being invisible again. These beliefs are not evil…they’re confused.
The ego wants to dethrone God, says the Course. It wants to make its own rules. And if God stands for joy, freedom, light, then the ego stands for struggle, control, and being right about being wronged.
It’s dramatic, theatrical, and very convincing.
But here’s the twist: if we choose sickness, we can also unchoose it.
Healing as a Threat?
The Course doesn’t say healing is difficult. It says it’s instant, but only when we see no more value in pain.
This is not a magic trick. It’s a shift in perception.
And this shift can be terrifying to the ego.
If I am healed, says the ego, I am responsible. I can no longer blame the world, my parents, my DNA, my horoscope, or the moon. I will have to face the freedom I secretly fear. Freedom requires forgiveness.
It asks me to let go of the identity I built around being “the one who suffers.”
That’s not easy. But it is worth everything.
A Loving Example:
Imagine Anna. She has had back pain for years. She’s tried everything: massage, acupuncture, diets, yoga. She prays for healing but still wakes up stiff.
One day she hears this passage from ACIM and feels a jolt. Could there be something she’s holding onto?
She sits quietly and asks,: “What does this pain give me?”
Tears come. “It gives me permission to rest,” she whispers. “It protects me from overdoing. It keeps people from asking too much.”
And in that moment, she sees: the pain is doing a job. It’s serving a purpose.
And she can thank it and choose another way.
Maybe she says:
I no longer need this pain to feel safe. I choose peace instead.
And maybe her back still hurts the next day, but something has shifted.
She’s not a victim anymore.
She’s a chooser.
This article isn’t saying that sickness is fake, or that anyone is bad for being ill. The Course is never about guilt, it’s about freedom. It tells us that even the deepest suffering is not what we truly are. We are not our diagnoses. We are not our pain.
We are light.
We are the dreamers of a dream we can change.
So if you’re reading this and you’re hurting, be kind to yourself. Let this be a gentle question, not an accusation:
Is there any value I still see in this pain?
And if I saw none, would I be willing to let it go?
Not by force. Not by guilt.
But by choosing to remember:
I am as God created me.
Whole. Free. And deeply loved.
With love and light,
G.