By Gonny 
(Inspired by ACIM Lesson 134)
Most of people think forgiveness means this:
“You really did something terrible, but I’m going to be the bigger person and forgive it (a tiny hint of superiority ?? 
)…I forgive you because we are all sinners! (making sins real) …I forgive you but promise me you will never do it again (conditional) …I forgive you but only if you will go to visit my mum (blackmail) ….I forgive you but you have to forgive me next time I’ll do something wrong (conditional)
But according to A Course in Miracles, that’s not forgiveness at all. In fact, that version is the ego’s idea of forgiveness. And the ego wouldn’t recognize real love even if it danced naked in front of it.
So, what is forgiveness then?
Forgiveness is not saying the bad thing was okay.
Forgiveness is realizing: the bad thing never TRULY happened in reality.
Not in the eternal, unshakeable, ‘God-is-Love’ kind of reality.
Sure, it looked real. It felt real. But so do dreams, until you wake up.
True forgiveness is the art of waking up.
It’s looking at a person or situation and saying (with calm clarity):
“What I thought happened may have seemed real… but it was just a call for love. And love can only answer with love.”
It’s not denial.
It’s not pretending you weren’t hurt.
It’s seeing through the illusion to the deeper truth:
No one can truly harm the Self that God created.
That Self is still whole, still safe, still love.
Imagine someone cuts in front of you in traffic. (a tough one for me
)
The ego says: That jerk! Mission impossible…even to think about forgiving him.
Spiritual bypassing says: It’s okay, I forgive him. But he’s still a jerk!!
ACIM-style forgiveness says:
That was just an illusion bumping into another illusion. I choose peace instead of this. (And yes, you can still use your blinker and stay in your lane. Miracles are practical.)
So how do you do it?
Here’s the Course’s simple tool:
Whenever you’re tempted to judge, pause and ask:
“Do I really want to accuse myself of this?”
Because what you see in your brother is just a mirror of what you believe about yourself.
Choose to see innocence, and you get to feel free too.
The great twist?
Forgiveness is not some heroic act you offer others.
It’s the gift you give yourself.
It sets you free.
It untangles your mind from guilt, resentment, and old stories.
It brings you back to the one place where peace lives: now.
And the best part?
You don’t have to figure it out alone.
The Holy Spirit is your inner GPS. All you have to say is:
“I’m willing to see this differently.”
And Love will do the rest.
So next time you’re tempted to declare someone guilty…your partner, a politician, your past self…just smile and remember:
“Ah, another opportunity to wake up and love again.”
Because real forgiveness doesn’t say: “You’re wrong, but I’ll be nice about it.” It says: You are still as God created you. And so am I. Let’s go home!!
With love and light,
G.